living resiliency

Last night I went to watch my 12-year-old foster nephew, Josh, play in his last Town of QC youth basketball league game. They won, by 25 points, but the blog isn't about winning basketball games. It's about living resiliency.

You see, Josh had to testify in criminal court against his mother yesterday afternoon to prove that she had abused him, not just "disciplined" him. His story began a year ago when he was removed from his home after he had run away to a friend's house and his friend's mother (who works for CPS....do you think God played a role here?) called the police. He was originally placed with his aunt, but after a month of living there he came to live with Melissa and Jeff, my stepsister and her husband. Josh is one of the most respectful, kind, and funny kids I've ever met. He has every reason to have behavior problems, aggression problems, etc., but he doesn't have any. His sister came to live with him and Melissa and Jeff in February, but caused so many problems over the course of her time there that she went off to another foster home toward the end of the summer. She was a sweet girl, but the abuse and subsequent removal from her home had certainly done more damage to her emotionally than to Josh.

I have had a lot of fun with Josh in the time he's been with the family - he comes to the Boys & Girls Club during school breaks, he came with me to my first Roadrunners hockey game in March, we've hung out when Melissa and Jeff have been busy, we've done things like making cupcakes, watching movies, going to dinners with friends/family, making fun of techno music...the list goes on and on. There's a possibility that he will be adopted by Melissa and Jeff if, after the Permanency Hearing at the end of October, it is determined that his mother's parental rights will be severed. That could takes months, even years, to officially happen, though.

Last night he played basketball. His team won, and he had a huge group of people there to watch him - all of his grandparents, a couple of aunts, friends from church. He talked about his experience at the courthouse very matter-of-factly, but with a hint of relief. He sat respectfully during dinner, speaking when spoken to and was his usual polite self. He thanked everyone for being there for him. There are a lot of people in his corner who love him and cheer for him, whether it's cheering for him through prayer about his testimony in court, or doing the wave and catcalling him from the sidelines of a basketball game. I think that is what makes him "living resiliency."