Friends, I have come to realize a lot of things in the past few days about love and marriage. First love is an action (or actions), not a feeling. Will I always feel "in love?" No, not realistically. I am there for better...and for worse. The "worse" is when I usually lose that lovin' feeling. Am I still obligated to show my love? ALWAYS. It's words and actions that show a person how much you love them, not necessarily how you feel about that person.
Second, marriage takes a lot of work, and you have to be dedicated to making it work with every fiber of your being. Just like a person who goes to the doctor every year for a check-up, even if s/he does not feel ill, a good marriage requires re-examination and a tune up periodically to make sure all the parts are working together and in tip-top shape.
Steven and I went to see the movie Fireproof at church on Friday night, and it was a challenge to both of us. It was a wake up call to how easily we slip into routines, take our spouse for granted, place higher value on things than the relationship, etc. We purchased the book The Love Dare and we are working our way through it. It's a 40-day journey to winning back the heart of your spouse. Day 1 was to say something nice, or say nothing at all. Day 2 (which is where I am right now) is to do an unexpected gesture for your spouse in addition to saying only positive things. It's tough, and it is only through the grace of God that this journey is going to be successful. But a flabby body doesn't become svelte and thin by accident...you have to work at it. Marriage is the same way. It doesn't become whole, healthy, and functioning by accident. It takes work, dedication, blood, sweat and tears.
Monday, May 11, 2009
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